In the spirit of Thanksgiving by Christine Crytzer
The Frederick family has had three successful Thanksgiving reunions. All were at the Fox Chapel Racquet Club in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and without the assistance of a professional caterer.
Here's what we learned after three Thanksgiving reunions:
Tour the facility, especially the kitchen, several days in advance to learn what is missing (serving silverware, dishes or pot holders and plastic gloves) and what equipment might not be functioning (ovens, microwaves or sinks).
Encouraged family members to bring guests and friends.
Don't charge a fee. Instead ask everyone to bring something based on their talents and ability to pay. Everyone contributed to the success of the reunion from beverages to desserts, favors (see sidebar), floral arrangements and hors d'oeuvres to fully-cooked, stuffed turkeys.
Be specific about what members should bring. Being open-ended might reap too many side dishes or desserts, although leftovers are popular with the Frederick clan. Assign items alphabetically. For example, A-E were responsible for side dishes, F-N desserts, etc.
Involve the kids. They wrote the letters of "Happy Thanksgiving" on large sheets of paper, then stood up and shouted "Happy Thanksgiving!" to start the meal. Near the end of the day there was story-telling for kids and adults.
Divide large tasks. For example, assign more than one person to be responsible for kitchen duties. Delegate every single important task, even ordering linens and taking pictures, watching children and clean up.
Assign someone to call each family to the buffet table and help control the hungry crowd.
Assign someone to refill beverages, side dishes, breads, and desserts. This way you won't discover after the reunion you really didn't run out of something that was in demand.
Clean up spills immediately to prevent falls. It's also a good idea to have emergency phone numbers handy.
Decorate a Thanksgiving Day tree. Everyone was asked to write what they were thankful for on the back of their name tags and then hang them on a large potted tree.
Designate a place of honor. We had comfortable chairs in front of the fireplace so head of the family, 86-year-old Betty Frederick, from Arizona, could talk with her 10 children, 33 grandchildren, 40 great-grandchildren,
and 2 great-great-grandchildren.
Chose not to have a disc jockey so family members could talk without having to compete with loud music.
Some people still want to be entertained. Include a survey with the invitation for ideas and suggestions. Something as simple as door prizes are popular with kids and adults. At one reunion, we had a slide show of pictures submitted by everyone. We also used computer enhancement to combine pictures of people to see what their future children might look like. Attendees liked the software creations; technical assistance was provided.
Set up a tripod and camera so families can have their pictures taken. Many tuck the photos in their Christmas cards.
Encourage parents of young children to give little ones a snack or a light meal in case dinner is late.
Be flexible and patient. For instance, if someone insists on doing something a certain way and is willing to be responsible, then let the person do it. If it doesn't turn out quite right, remember not to do it that way next time.
Keep a file of what worked and what didn't work. The next reunion organizers will appreciate it.
Pray about the function before, during (including grace) and after. One final piece of advice: Be thankful no matter what happens, whether dinner is late or food burns. Having a plan is important, but being flexible is critical.
Lambert's Thanksgiving reunion
The seven Lambert family branches experience their best attendance every five years at Thanksgiving weekend reunions. The weather is lovely in Louisiana and everyone has time off. Each branch designates a coordinator who is responsible for communicating with their members from early planning through a final agenda sent one month before the event.
Last Thanksgiving weekend 204 members assembled at the original 1927 family home still owned by a descendant where the seven Lambert children were raised on Bayou Latanache in Innis, Louisiana.
The Lamberts were made to feel like real celebrities by Innis stores and shops with window signs that read "Congratulations on your Lambert Family Reunion!"
The reunion program was centered around the theme: "The Lambert Tribe: Pilgrims and Indians Reunion" to celebrate their early American and Cherokee Indian heritage. The theme was carried out in decorations and directory design. Computer generated awards included Long Time No-See Um, Pow-Wow Chief and Tribal Generations awards. A letter from President Clinton recognizing the reunion was shared.
Lambert children enjoy the funny stories told by elders who have heard them many times before. Games planned for the kids gave parents more time to visit. At their last reunion there was a scavenger hunt, someone taught the Macarena and the kids did a dance performance. Cousins knew one another well by the end of the day.
Visiting was facilitated by arranging a head table where elders sat comfortably while family members visited them. Members sitting at the head table are introduced and each gives a brief welcome. A catered buffet lunch was arranged by family living locally.
The Lamberts have a generations old family tree modernized using Family TreeMaker software. The tree was once a 4' x 6' poster board. Now the tree is updated on the computer when members submit changes.
One cousin is in charge of old family photos. She's copied everyone's old photos and returned originals. Order forms are available to buy reprints. Lamberts like to decorate their homes with old family photos. New photos of the whole group are taken at each reunion and of each of the seven family branches. Photos were used in the local newspaper.
Lamberts also produce a family directory to facilitate communication, add to unity and assist future correspondence.
Lamberts love to give thanks on Thanksgiving. reported by Pauline Bizette Brandy, a Lambert descendant
The stockings were placed by the agave with care
It wasn't a typical white Christmas. Seventeen members and three generations of the Wood Family Reunion had hung their homemade stockings on a giant agave (desert plant) at Grapevine Canyon Ranch, Pearce, Arizona. They were celebrating their semi-annual reunion by taking over the entire ranch (kids must be 12) – an intimate working cattle ranch with riding, roping, soaking up history and relaxing.
The Wood reunion began when T.R. (Dick), the patriarch decided that he wanted family gatherings to be less centered around dishes and bed making and more quality family togetherness. His solution was adventurous reunions distant from any one family's home.
The retired Corning Glass ceramics engineer decided to organize the reunions, "threw in" hosting and gave his family a reunion every-other-year. Between reunions everyone explores their own area – Seattle, Calgary, New York and Texas – looking for ideal reunion locations. A popular evening activity is showing slides from these independent forays. The process seems to work. They've stayed on a smaller dude ranch in Montana and rafted the Rougue River in Oregon, some sleeping under the stars. They look for places with interesting nearby attractions. Grapevine Canyon Ranch is close to Tombstone, "the town too tough to die," Bisbee a quaint mining-town-turned-artists'-colony and historic trails that criss cross the 10,000 ranch. Friendly ranch hands point out sites where Chief Cochise, Geronimo and the US Cavalry once clashed.
Dick Wood found a dude ranch a good choice for pleasing three generations with horses for experienced and novice riders along with excellent accommodations.
Gift Exchange
While we are not fond of the name of this game, it is fun and worth consideration if you're celebrating Christmas in July (or June or August or ...) at your reunion. It is called “Mean Santa.”
During pre reunion communications, you'll want to announce and promote this activity. Ask anyone who wishes to participate, to bring a wrapped gift to the reunion. You can add that the gift should be valued at $5 or $10 or $20.
At the reunion, each participant receives a ticket when they check in their gift. Later when you play, you will draw tickets one at a time. The person whose ticket is drawn can select one of the wrapped gifts, then, open it in front of everyone. If that person likes the gift and wants to keep it, h/she can. If she doesn’t like it, however, she can pick an already-opened gift she likes better. She simply takes the one she likes better from the person who holds it, and gives that person the unwanted gift instead, hence the name, “Mean Santa.”
To avoid kids receiving wine glasses or a gift certificate to Starbucks, urge members to bring wrapped and labeled gifts that would be more appropriate for kids.
Hint: this type of exchange makes it best to hold the last ticket drawn to be assured of getting the gift you really want.
