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Reunion activities-8
These activities are from many reunions, reported first in Reunions magazine. We invite you to e-mail us your special reunion activities.
Invite your ancestors in your family reunion!
by Edith Wagner
Include your ancestors in your family reunions. Go to them!
The importance of cemeteries to reunions is one of enormous fascination. They are places where proximity to history and ancestors is compelling.
Cemeteries particularly can be of high interest and not least as fascination for the children. A good example is the Iddings Family Reunion.
When 250 descendants of George Washington’s right-hand man, General "Mad Anthony" Wayne, had their first Iddings Family Reunion they didn’t mind that their ancestor was described as "mad." Suzanne Gordon told the story about the three-day family celebration in Valley Forge, Pennsylvania, the heart of the family home that dates back nearly 300 years.
A tour included visits to Iddings family homes, Wayne’s birthplace and cemeteries. The focus was to engage children with Wayne’s colorful history. They were fascinated. They saw one of Wayne’s graves at Old St. David’s Church cemetery. According to historical records, Wayne’s bones are buried in the family plot at St. David’s; his flesh is buried in Erie, Pennsylvania in 1796. The kids thought details of Wayne’s internment were definitely "cool."
One family of Killoughs was massacred by outlaws in 1838. Their burial spot, outside Jacksonville, Texas, was declared a State historical site during the 1930s when a monument was erected by WPA workers. Almost twenty years later, John A. Killough was appalled to find monument grounds overgrown and hardly distinguishable from the surrounding forest. While clearing the cemetery, the reunion idea was born and the first one organized in 1955.
According to Juanita Killough Urbach, a procession on reunion Sunday winds along a narrow blacktop road to the Killough monument. At this hallowed spot they annually listen to State Historian, and honorary Killough, Jack Moore, recite the story of the Killough massacre as he has for many years. Upkeep of the cemetery is the responsibility of the family corporation whose perpetual fund assures its future. With such foresight and enthusiasm, Killough history is sure to survive.
Reunions take cemetery responsibility
Responsibility for cemetery upkeep, maintenance, restoration and repair is among many families’ reunion activities. Cemetery projects can also include research, recording data, mapping and tombstone rubbings. Some families use the occasion of the reunion to clean and plant gravesites and plots while others raise funds to hire cemetery services.
The Warner Family Reunion used a Chinese Auction (bids for prizes are made with 25¢ tickets) to increase their cemetery fund and finance future reunions.
Joan Sandall Tempers, Topeka, Kansas, says her family has held one-day annual reunions in Nebraska for over sixty years. The family published its genealogy and financially supports a private cemetery on the site of a Swedish Lutheran church founded by four ancestors.
The Irwin Family Reunion tradition began in 1878 when adult children of Peter Irwin, son of Nathaniel Irwin, met to clean up the Old Seceder Cemetery, Downington, Pennsylvania. Men trimmed grass and repaired the wall and tombstones. Women and children prepared a picnic. According to C. Patricia Irwin Lesley Irwin reunions today are a mix of families raised in the tradition and newcomers. Care of the Old Seceder Cemetery is still a priority. Dues of $2 per adult are used for cemetery maintenance and family records preservation.
Tour cemeteries
Cemeteries are included in many reunion tour itineraries. The Maxon family enjoyed several exciting trans-continental reunions, then returned to their home town, Olean, New York, for a nostalgic look at their past. According to Karen Maxon, they visited the homestead, alma maters, old haunts and the family cemetery plot.
An Adell Family Reunion brought together the family’s Midwest, Texas and West Coast branches, descendants of Charles and Augusta Adell. The reunion in Lindsborg, Kansas, included tours of cemeteries where Adell patriarchs are buried.
For one Gilmore Family Reunion in Arkansas the family chose the theme "Celebrating Our Roots." A highlight of the three days was a chartered bus tour of Magnolia, the original homesite, and Pine Bluff where they held a memorial service at the cemetery where ancestors are buried.
Descendants of Danish brothers Andrew and Rasmus Larsen, who married sisters Marie and Ane Davidson, began their reunion day with services at the Lutheran church their ancestors attended. They walked through several cemeteries to visit ancestral graves.
Pete Holste, organizer of the reunion of Daniel Boone descendants, reported that during a reunion in Kentucky, they visited Frankfort cemetery where Boone's remains were thought to be re-interred, and Ft. Harrodsburg, where they saw an historic re-enactment of the kidnapping of Daniel Boone's daughter by Indians.
Rose Sheldon Newton, Sheldon Family Association, Inc., Fort Wayne, Indiana, says visits to a former homestead, cemetery or battlefield are incorporated into Sheldon Family Reunions. Recently, Sheldons also returned to the site of the Deerfield (Massachusetts) Massacre, where colonial ancestors were murdered or carried into slavery in Canada.
Carolyn Wilson-Elliott combined her small family reunion with genealogy research at the Arkansas Historical Society Four Corners Ancestor Fair.
An exhibitor introduced Wilson-Elliott to a distant cousin who told family stories about convicted murderers and train robbers — a great hit with the children. The new cousin directed them to another relative who had researched the family back to 1660. They pored over photos, looking for family resemblances. They spent an extra day in Arkansas visiting sites of family stories and drove to Round Mountain Cemetery and walked among the headstones where many ancestors lie buried. They matched family stories with ancestors. One refused to fight during the Civil War; one was a self-taught mid-wife; one died when he fell into the fireplace during an epileptic seizure; and one was murdered. At the base of Round Mountain they discovered the White River where an ancestor drowned.
Storytelling with the spirits of your ancestors
Family members should be encouraged to share tales about the people buried in the cemetery. Most families include memorial services in their programs which are particularly poignant at the cemetery.
When genealogist Sharon DeBartolo Carmack, CGRS, attended the Carmack reunion, she suggested a tour of cemeteries where family members were buried. Carmack says she learned more about the family than she could ever find in traditional genealogical records. She videotaped pictures of tombstones and had older family members narrate stories about the deceased. Carmack learned her grandfather, David McMasters, died on top of his roof adjusting the lightening rod during a thunderstorm!
Cemeteries are a wonderful place to teach children about respect for the dead and the sacredness of the final resting place. Explain that a cemetery is a museum without walls. Many tombstones are hundreds of years old and are not to be climbed on, colored on or knocked down.
At one Glenn Family Reunion, they dedicated headstones for Starling and Eliza Glenn (born 1823 and 1827 in Winnsboro, South Carolina). Benjamin Glenn led a tour of the small cemetery and enthralled his grandchildren with family tales recalled by other headstones.
What if you can’t get to the cemetery?
If your reunion is not near family plots, bring the cemetery to the reunion. Designate a cemetery committee — people who live near ancestors graves. Ask the committee to make slides, videotape and tombstone rubbings to present a "cemetery tour." During the presentation encourage members to reminisce about departed family members, tell funny stories or other memories.
More great cemetery stories!
Margaret Kaffka Garrehy, Sacramento, California, and Pat (Crotty) Glugla, Deerbrook, Wisconsin, met when Naomi Engelmann, indexer at the Antigo (WI) Library noticed that both were researching the same family. What are the odds? The outcome of this chance meeting was a reunion, the Stanislaus Glugla Connection — Greatful Dead Tour, at Queen of Peace Catholic Cemetery in Antigo. The day before the reunion each grave marker was given a final check and decorated with flowers. Margaret and husband, Den Garrehy, parked their motorhome next to the cemetery building to mount a 14-page computer-generated descendant list for Stanislaus Glugla (born 1820 in Poland, emigrated to America in 1870).
Antoinette Kyle Ketner Bengtson, Lincoln, Nebraska, left a note in a bottle at the Gibboney Family Square, East End Cemetery in Wytheville, Virginia. Jean Bourne, a cousin from Blacksburg, Virginia, found the note when she visited the gravesites and the Gibboney Family Reunion found another descendant.
Without plans for internment, Carolyn Sigler Schellang’s only sister Billie Linda Sigler Taylor died in 1995. She wanted to bury her sister in the Sigler Cemetery in Shelby County, Tennessee. Land for the cemetery was donated in February 1870 by Littleton Smith Sigler and deeded to Sigler heirs.
Carolyn was dismayed by the overgrown weeds and broken headstones and discovered that few family members even knew about the cemetery. Maintenance had become too much for family members who were trying to take care of it. She has since been finding and notifying family about the cemetery and has resurrected a family reunion at the site. With money donated by "found" kin they’ve been able to build a fence, a new concrete drive and install a wrought iron half moon over the entrance with the Sigler name in it. She credits her cousin, Ray Sigler, and uncle, Joe Sigler, for their hard work and letting kin know their donations were being spent only for cemetery care.
Finally, one of our favorite cemetery reunions is of the descendants of John J. and Mary Jane Farrell held at St. Mary’s Catholic Church and cemetery at Pine Bluff, Wisconsin. Ancestor, James Farrell, hauled the lumber to build the church in the 1850s and five generations of Farrells are burined in the church cemetery.
Member and liturgical choreographer, Michele White, Chicago, Illniois, wrote an elaborate performance both in the church during Mass and later in the cemetery. She hand-made banners and streamers of colors representing each of eight siblings from whom reunion members are descended. When Mass ended, someone representing each ancestor led their relatives behind banners to the cemetery. Once there each banner carrier recited the names of everyone in their branch. To the strains of an Irish bagpipe, White danced and connected tombstones with color ribbons to match banners. When it was over and in a soft breeze, the little cemetery was ablaze in a colorful web of ribbons and banners (the video tape is spectacular!!).
FYI
Cemetery markers for veterans
Most veterans discharged under honorable conditions are eligible for a free marker. You’ll need proof of military service; the soldier’s name on a muster roll, a pension record, or extracts from state files. Federal or Confederate military service and pension records are in the national or state archives where the soldier enlisted. Confederate pension records are found in the state archives where a veteran applied for pension.
With proof of military service, you can ask Uncle Sam for one type of marker; (1) a monument for a soldier’s grave, (2) a memorial for a soldier whose remains aren’t recoverable, (3) a plaque for a soldier’s crypt. To order a plaque, an upright or flat monument, complete VA Form 40-1330: Application for Standard Government Monument, from Monument Services (42), Dept. of Veterans Affairs, 810 Vermont Ave NW, Washington DC 20420.
Markers weigh about 230 lbs and are shipped free of charge but do not include installation costs. All markers remain federal property. Anyone with knowledge of a deceased veteran may apply for a monument. Only next-of-kin may apply for a memorial. Applicants must certify there’s no privately placed marker already in place.
About the writer
Edith Wagner is the editor of Reunions magazine, author of Reunions Workbook and Catalog and The Family Reunion Sourcebook (Lowell House, Los Angeles) in bookstores now. She collects material for this site and Reunions magazine from reunions and invites you to e-mail us your reunion ideas, concerns or questions.
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