Class
reunion tips, ideas and advice
Party Plan Ideas and Themes
Learn from Class Reunions
Linda Johnson Hoffman and Neal Barnett in The Reunion Planner suggest raffles to make up budget shortfalls. Solicit donations from a fine restaurant or theater for dinners or tickets for two. You can buy rolls of raffle tickets from stationery and office supply stores, and you can offer a mention in your memory book/program in exchange for donations from your sponsors. The mechanics are relatively simple. Sell tickets before and during the reunion; then when you announce the winner, be sure to prominently mention the names of donors. The same book suggests raffling or auctioning centerpieces. Another kind of raffle calls for placing numbered envelopes at each table (same numbers at each table). Ask everyone to place donations in numbered envelopes, then draw one for a winner at each table and donate the rest to the reunion cause.
In How to Organize Your High School Reunion, Glenn A. Jacobs maintains that some costs can be covered by asking for additional donations either in cash or services. An extra financial commitment can come as printing invitations, programs, memory books or newsletters, flowers, decorations, food, beverages, advertising, or newspaper notices. Another way to raise money is to obtain a one-day liquor license for an open bar. In planning an open bar be sure someone agrees in advance to buy leftover liquor.
This just
in from an anonymous reader
“I just have to share my high school reunion
of four days ago. We decided to have a '60s Bash including 15
classes. It was held at a hotel for $15 person, delicious food
and lots of it. I had the time of my life. When planning class
reunions, we forget we went to school with many different classmates,
not just the ones we graduated with. This is the best idea for
class reunions. I was able to be there with my older brother and
sister. It was fantastic.”
Over a
year ago Jane Pipia emailed Reunions magazine about some dilemmas
she had encountered in planning her 20th reunion for the New Berlin
(WI) West High School Class of 1981. We asked her to write from
time to time to report her reunion progress. She was enormously
generous sharing much of what she was thinking and feeling about
developments. Following (edited to space constraints) are some
of Jane’s experiences.
Diary of a class reunion organizer
by Jane Pipia
August
I am having a lot of fun planning this reunion. I am a do-er and
my problem is that when something needs to get done I am first
to raise my hand and say I'll do it. I have to make a conscious
effort to keep my hand in my lap and let other people help. But
I know that if I'm doing it, it will get done.
I wanted to be involved in this planning but I didn't realize
how much I’d enjoy hearing from old friends and classmates.
We have a diverse group on the committee and that is good. The
only committee downfall we have is the lack of men. We only have
one guy consistently showing up depending on his work schedule.
At our ten-year reunion the committee consisted of people from
the "in" crowd. A few mentioned the reunion still felt
like high school. I guess at the 20th we have grown up. I was
definitely not in the "in" crowd. I’ve started
contacting people to learn what their thoughts are and that got
the ball rolling.
Before we can set a date, although we knew we wanted it in late
summer or early fall, we have to visit hotels to see who can accommodate
us. Most hotels have minimums and some won't include money spent
at the bar in the minimum.
November
We had our meeting and things went very well. We decided on a
date, and committee members chipped in for the hotel’s $500
deposit.
A couple of people pushed hard for the later homecoming date to
take advantage of the whole spirit of "coming home."
One problem is getting a hotel banquet room in the area that can
accommodate 200+ during homecoming. The homecoming date did
not work.
Others think we should look for a hotel that can accommodate us
and not be a slave to the date. They believe that we must have
it at a hotel to encourage people coming in from out of state
and those who want to stay overnight.
Most people realize it makes more sense to have everything at
one place. That makes it easier on the committee and classmates,
especially the ones from out of town.
We meet once a month at an old high school bar/grill hangout and
the number one issue is addresses. Getting current contact information
has been the biggest and most time-consuming part of the reunion.
We went to the guidance office at school and got a graduation
list, which includes phone numbers. Although they are 20 years
old, some parents still have the same number. We’ve split
the list between us, each being responsible for locating people
with names starting with specific letters. We’ve checked
all area phone books, gathered numbers, and our friends already
had contacted our classmates who had registered with classmates.com.
We listed a reunion contact; it helped. I created a spreadsheet
listing grads’ names, addresses, phone and email and we kept
adding to it.
At Office Depot we purchased postcards that can be put through
any printer. Before Christmas card season we mailed out a very
basic postcard. NBHS 1981 20th Reunion, the date, the location,
phone number, email address, website address, and asked for help
gathering addresses.
January
I’ve mailed out the first group of questionnaires. After
every meeting another batch will go out to the new-found addresses.
The website provides an online form that can be filled out and
many are using this.
We are having monthly meetings with six regulars and four stopping
in to see old friends. We have had to compromise on some plans
because, as always, people have different ideas of what should
happen. But talking it out as a group really makes a difference.
We had one fellow who really wanted a few things a specific way.
After talking it through we realized they just couldn't be and
sadly he left the committee. We have e-mailed or left messages
asking him to come back, but ... nothing. Not everyone works well
on a team.
It's neat being on the committee and being the online contact
on classmates.com because I get to have little reunions with new
people just stopping in or e-mailing. When the reunion comes around
I will have reconnected with so many more people than I would
have if I had only the night of the reunion.
One of the best things about e-mail is that people are more open.
People I barely knew in school have been e-mailing, some regularly.
I have even become friends with a classmate’s sister who
lives in Colorado.
Reunion plans are going smoothly. Our first mailing of the official
invitation will go out this week (before the postal increase).
We have the date, the location and a DJ, so the big things are
complete. One of the girls on the committee is a decorator and
she will do table decorations at cost. My husband is a commercial
artist, and he will design our keepsake booklet and get printing
at cost.
At our next meeting we’ll gather more names and addresses
of missing classmates and decide on an event for Sunday after
the reunion. We hope to have a family picnic so people can bring
their kids and introduce them to old friends; it will also give
people another chance to reconnect.
Search tips
Go to anybirthday.com and enter a name or even a partial zip code
of where someone was born. "I typed in name and ’53,
figuring most people I was looking for were born in southeastern
Wisconsin," Pipia reported. You will get a list of names
with birthdates. Choose a name whose birthday falls within a year
or so of most of your classmates and anybirthday.com will provide
all the known zip codes this person lived in.
For unfamiliar zip codes, ups.com allows you to enter a zip code
to get the name of the city. Once you have the name and city/state,
you can go to the white pages at infospace.com and enter the name,
city and state to see if there is a listing for the person.
"I tried this with a dozen plus names and located five additional
people for our reunion. So it does work," Pipia concluded.
"We had a class of about 300 and we found all but 32, so
we are pretty proud of that. But it took a lot of phone calls,
even calling people back more than once if they didn’t return
our calls! We had a cop on our committee, and toward the end we
gave him a list; he found over 50 people for us, so if you have
a cop on board - great!"
Post-reunion glow
I was very involved in the planning and it may sound like bragging,
but I cannot say enough about our reunion.
The official invitation went out six or seven weeks before the
reunion, and then more went out, with the questionnaire, as we
received the new addresses. Of course, as the time approached
we wound up calling a lot of people, as our response was low.
This got many people to respond, but it was irritating nevertheless,
as you have lots of other things to do and of course your own
life to deal with. This is a huge commitment of time and effort.
People don't really understand that. We still had people who called
just days before and wanted to come.
We had a Friday night ice breaker at Kuglitch's, now AMF Bowling,
where a lot of us hung out in high school. We had a small room
and gave them $350 for beer, wine, soda, pretzels etc. About 40
showed up (about what we expected) from 7 to 11PM. This was very
nice.
The Saturday night main event was held at Olympia Resort in Oconomowoc,
Wisconsin. The hall and the services were outstanding.
We had cleared a couple of things with the hall and the DJ ahead
of time, and looking back, these were among our best moves. We
asked the hall manager and DJ whether they could extend our stay
and the music past midnight if the night was going well. The hall
manager said we could have the bartenders until only 1:00AM, but
the hall was ours as long as we wanted it. We had a self-serve
half-barrel of beer that stayed even after the bartenders left.
The DJ said he would stay (and charge) as long as we wanted him.
We brought food (mini sandwiches, veggies, dip, cheese and sausage)
because we didn’t want anyone to go home hungry.
Everyone had a wonderful time. And we had many requests for a
25th (rather than a 30th). I will be involved with planning that.
Our reunion website (www.pipia.com/nbhs1981) will stay up with
pictures of the 20th, so people who were unable to attend can
take a look. There is also a form to update information (name,
address, phone).
Name tags with graduation photos were a BIG plus plus and really
needed, but it was also a very big and time-consuming job.
Disposable cameras were placed on every table. Viewing pictures
with committee members was a hoot! About 50 or 60 of the pictures
are on our web site. The remaining 500 were mailed to people who
were in the pictures with a note asking them to make copies for
others in the picture and to forward them. We did our best to
distribute them well.
About 30 came with their families to our Sunday family picnic
at Naga-waki Park. We provided soda, chips, veggies, cookies,
brownies, plates, plastic flatware and water balloons. It was
a lot of fun to meet old friends and see kids play together.
Except for committee members, no one was at both the picnic on
Sundayt and the ice-breaker on Friday. And many of the people
at the Friday and Sunday events did not come to the reunion for
one reason or another. We felt very good about the fact that these
additional people got to see some of their old friends.
However, it was a long, long weekend and I don't know if we will
have a three-day event for the 25th; it may be just the reunion
next time. It was not easy to make it to the family picnic on
Sunday after such a late night. We have heard from several people
who wanted to come but after Saturday night they just couldn't.
Does this mean we’re getting old? In our youth we went out
every night and it didn't matter!
We have $1,300 left over. We are going to talk to the New Berlin
West principal and hope to donate $300 to the school for a piece
of equipment. The remaining $1,000 is going into a 24-month renewable
CD, so in four years when we start planning the 25th, we’ll
have funds available.
I will miss our monthly committee meetings. The group knew each
other in school of course, but we were not "friends."
So as a bonus on top of having a great time at the reunion and
being proud of the fact that so many other people did too, we
made new friends with whom we will hopefully stay in touch.
Costs/budget
Stationery supplies $ 200.00
Postage 400.00
Printing (135 books) 900.00
Name tags 110.00
Decorations 200.00
Friday night 350.00
Hors d’houevres 500.00
Dinner/beer & soda 6,300.00
DJ 550.00
Bar tip 100.00
Sunday picnic 350.00
We charged $60 per person. We lost some people because of the
price but we felt that for all they received, it was worth it.
Those who couldn't pay $60 could come on Friday or Sunday at no
cost at all. We know now that if we do not have the Friday and
Sunday events we could charge about $50/$55 per person, but we
really wanted to be comfortable and show everyone a good time.
We didn't want to skimp and we certainly didn't want to be caught
short of money.
About the author
Jane Pipia lives in Brookfield, Wisconsin, with Frank, her husband
of 18 years, 6 year old daughter, Hailey, and another baby due
in May, "just proving it's not too late," she says.
She volunteers at Children's Hospital of WisconsinTelethon, teaches
second grade religion class at our church and is her daughter’s
Brownie Scout troop leader. She and her husband have owned a design
for 12 years which gives her "the flexibility to devote time
to help organize the reunion."
TIPS
Internet
keeps Class of ‘82 connected
by Chris Carrel
For most people high school reunions occur every ten years. Participants
travel to re-connect for an evening, then return home and lose
contact with classmates for another decade. Thanks to the Internet,
the high school reunion is being redefined; at least for 1982
graduates of Decatur High School in Federal Way, Washington.
Through a
web site created by Decatur alumnus Kim (Giskin) Sedlacek, old
classmates are re-connecting daily, reaching out from their homes
to meet in cyberspace.
The Class
of 1982 web site (www.geocities.com/timjon.geo/)
covers many area high schools. It features lists of classmates'
e-mail addresses, photos of high school days, current photos,
their families and a message board. Decatur grads can search for
old friends, send e-mail, leave bulletin board messages, announce
babies, new businesses and important life events.
"It’s
fun to just look through it," says Decatur grad Jay Anonson.
"The page makes me think about faces, names and places I’ve
not thought about in a long time." Ironically, the web site
grew from Sedlacek's frustration using the Internet to locate
classmates. Six years after the Class of 1982's first reunion,
Sedlacek was wondering what happened to high school friends. On
the Internet she found web sites for locating classmates but only
a few Decatur alumni were listed and the sites charged for listings.
Sedlacek knew she could do better. The Boeing administrative assistant
had already designed several award-winning web sites, including
one for her three-year-old daughter Alli. [Alli's Busy World www.geocities.com/EnchantedForest/1006,
is listed in Internet Family Fun as one of the top children's
web sites.] A modest version of the Decatur web site premiered
in November 1998. Sedlacek found 10 alumni at Boeing and got permission
to list their e-mail addresses. The list grew quickly as word
spread. Everyone shared e-mails with Sedlacek. She tracked down
others on the Internet and by phone gathering nearly 80 e-mail
addresses by June.
E-mail allows
easy communication between grads, says Sedlacek. "With our
busy schedules, phone calls aren't always convenient," she
says. Most of us have young kids and both parents are working.
There's very little time. We can't always visit friends like when
we were younger." Classmates no longer living in the area
can stay in touch, like 1981 Decatur grad Keith Bragg who communicates
with classmates from his Tasmanian home — on the other side
of the planet. Although
the web site began with a Decatur focus, 1982 graduates of Federal
Way and Thomas Jefferson High Schools are also welcome. A smattering
of e-mail addresses from other high schools are on the web site,
and Sedlacek hopes to add more. Cyber-connections have spurred
personal relationships. Fifty web site patrons recently held a
"mini-reunion" at Federal Way's Scoreboard Tavern. Other
small reunions are being planned.
"There
are a bunch of little things planned," says Sedlacek, thanks
to the web site. She reports that cyber- and mini-reunions led
to romance for a few single alumni. As the web site's popularity
grows, more content is added. The site now includes links to classmates’
personal web sites, business and personal announcements and an
extensive photo gallery. Adding pictures was the brainchild of
1982 Federal Way grad Terri (Sabotka) Latta, who discovered the
web site browsing the Internet. She added photos from a collection
of pictures she'd taken during high school. Soon, Latta and Sedlacek
began adding current photos of alumni, their families and a mini-reunion.
"We get so pumped when we get a new address to add to the
list, or a new photo," says Latta. "It's becoming an
obsession."
With this
healthy obsession and the interest it’s generating, the Class
of 1982 web site seems destined to continue growing. That's good
news for 1982 grads who wonder whatever happened to old high school
pals. Now they don't have to wait for the 2002 class reunion to
find out. "So many of us have lost touch," says Federal
Way High School grad Sheri (Moreira) Vogt. "This is such
a simple way to say hello."
About
the author
Chris Carrel is a lifelong Federal Way, Washington, resident
and graduate of Decatur's Class of 1982. He found out about the
web site when Kim Sedlacek tracked him down.
Reunion book and
software revision
3rd Edition of The Reunion Planner Book and Software
Version 4.1
Since 1992, Linda Johnson Hoffman and Neal Barnett, authors of
The Reunion Planner book and software, have helped planners
with their class, family and military reunions. A revised 3rd
edition of the book is available with newly enhanced PC-compatible
software, now available on CD.
New features include biography entry section, biography reports,
enhanced search capability, enhanced data import and export features,
better statistics reporting, new report sort-by capability, completely
updated documentation, and more. There is also the ability to
include up to eight guests per member; up to eight items can be
purchased and up to six meal choices per guest can be ordered.
Many new name tag formats are also included.
Continued conveniences include data entry information for
each guest, including space for three phone numbers and an
email address and calculation for estimated and actual budgets.
You can generate to-do lists for committee members and choose
from many report options. Book and software, standard edition
is $49.95; professional edition is $149.95; compatible with
Windows 95/98/NT™/2000/XP. Click
here to purchase.
In this
report, Sunny McGinnis, past president of the National Association
of Reunion Managers, describes a disaster that should give some
class reunion chairpersons reason to consider hiring professionals. Disaster
recovery
by Sunny McGinnis
Two night reunion events are customary in Florida because most
reunions are held at beach locations and alumni like to make a
weekend of it. Several years ago, we planned a 10-year reunion
in St. Petersburg. Evidently, after a Friday cocktail party, someone
looked at another's wife wrong and a brawl broke out in one of
the guest rooms in the wee hours. Police were called. By the time
the situation was under control, the guest room was destroyed,
two men were arrested and the hotel decided to cancel their Saturday
banquet (the main event).
I received
THE call early Saturday morning. I urged the hotel to reconsider
their cancellation and allow the Saturday event to take place.
I offered to place a uniformed officer on site, personally attend
the event or anything they wanted. The answer was an adamant no!
The family-owned property wanted no part of any function whose
behavior was so destructive, and rightfully so. I had nine
hours to solve this problem. By 3:00 PM, the banquet was relocated
to another property. We were able to notify every guest and vendor
of the new location, provide enough food (although not what they
originally ordered) and we saved the reunion! The committee and
the guests were very appreciative and well-behaved. We accomplished
this recovery because of our good rapport with area facilities,
our organization skills and a great staff who went beyond the
call of duty and sacrificed their Saturday. About
the author
Sunny McGinnis is president of Reunion Celebrations; Tampa,
FL; 813-874-9967.
A funny
thing happened on the way to my high school reunion....
by Darla Methey
Darla Methey, president of Reunions by Design, San Diego, California
since 1994, has seen and heard it all. Reunions by Design's services
include everything needed to produce a perfect reunion, such as
search capabilities, reunion site selection, invitations, mailings,
photography/memory books, decorating and entertaining. With all
this said, what could possibly happen...?
These are
some of Methey's observations. Do you see yourself in any of the
examples?
The committee
It's like clock work...about one month before the reunion the
committee begins to have 'reunion stress'. In some cases the committee
chairperson becomes the bride. One committee chairperson called
us three to four times day a week prior to the reunion date wanting
to know who had signed up during the last hour(s).
Last year,
a chairperson called us between 2 and 3 AM for four days before
the reunion "just to talk." I told her she had to get
some sleep or we may just find asleep with her head in the salad
bowl during the reunion.
One committee
member wanted to hand out safe sex leaflets and condoms. One committee
chairperson wanted to replace all white light bulbs with orange
(school color) throughout the hotel property.
Another chairperson
wanted her committee to wear only school colors at the event.
She wanted women to wear light and dark blue dresses with white
shoes and men to wear dark blue suits, white shirts and light
blue ties (school spirit taken just a little too far).
Then there was the committee chairperson who wanted to taste four
or five glasses of different wines during the hotel's food tasting.
She wanted to be sure the hotel's bar was stocked with appropriate
wines (I don't think that was the reason).
The alumni...
The outfits that people wear, or should I say, squeeze into...
One woman
made her reservations months in advance but for whatever reason
purchased her dress reunion day. Minutes prior to the reunion,
as she was getting dressed at her hotel, she realized the security
tag was still attached. She dashed to the store to have it removed
only minutes before the store closed.
At another
reunion, a group of former football players decided to renew an
old skit that won them 1st place in the school's talent contest
their graduation year. However, ten years later, during the break
dancing part, one gentleman got down on the floor and tried to
get down and funky. He shouldn't have. His black dress slacks
ripped all the way down.
One alumna
called just hours prior to her reunion in tears. She had just
dyed her hair (never had before) and looked like, in her own words,
"something out of a science fiction movie."
Even my sister-in-law
had her eyebrows waxed for the very first time two days before
her reunion. A hairless gap in one eyebrow was noticed (you just
can't glue hair back).
However,
one of our favorite stories was a 30-year reunion. Toward the
latter part of the evening an alumna decided she needed to remove
painful pantyhose. Well, that was not the only item of clothing
she removed. Everything came off. She (age 48) ran back into the
grand ballroom stark naked and before anybody could catch her
(everybody was in shock), ran to the elevator until security caught
up with her.
Committee
members and alumni keep us on our toes. For the most part, it
creates a lot of joy to play such a huge part of reuniting old
friends with an occasional laughable story. As my own twenty-year
high school reunion approaches in the year of 1999, I will dust
off my gym membership card, color that gray right out of my hair,
and invest a small fortune in wrinkle-free creams.
About
the author
Darla Methey is president of Reunions by Design, San Diego,
California. She is a member of National Association of Reunion
Managers; 619-593-9357; or e-mail Darreunion@aol.com.
Is there
a good excuse?
Our good friend and former Reunions magazine editor, Mary Fobian
is co-chair of her Oelwein (Iowa) Community High School Class
of '69 reunion. One of her responsibilities is the newsletter
in which she included the following.
If you are
not coming to the reunion, you need a good excuse and a note from
your Mom. The following reasons have been tried and are unacceptable.
Excuse #1:
I'm overweight.
Rebuttal: You're not alone. Note t-shirt sizes being offered.
Excuse #2:
I'm a different person than I was in high school
Rebuttal: Lucky for you, we ALL are. Let's face it: we could only
have improved.
Excuse #3
I don't look as good as I'd like. I (choose one or more) am bald,
have wrinkles, saddlebags, grey hair and no one will recognize
me.
Rebuttal: Guess what! You won't recognize anyone else, either.
Using the reunion committee as a representative sample, our whole
class looks like a "before" photo in a plastic surgery
ad.
Excuse #4: I'm not successful. I'm not (choose one or more) a lawyer, a
doctor or rich.
Rebuttal: You'll be pleasantly surprised to find how much everyone
has matured. We may be plump and wrinkled (see Excuse #3, above)
but we're not stupid. Money is not success.
Excuse #5: I was not in a popular clique in school
Rebuttal: Now that we're old and smart, those cliques have dissolved
just like the superficialities they were based on. The only cliques
you'll notice at the reunion will be the sound of your joints
as you walk around.
Should
you invite teachers?
The answer to this common question from reunion organizers may
have more to do with whether teachers are even still alive than
whether or not to invite them. Of course, you should invite them.
Teachers were a very significant part of your high school experience
and can be an important part of your reunion. Now you can approach
them as an adult and probably discover what wonderful adults they
are!
In some cases
such as Sister Mary Godfrey Huber, the reunion may have to come
to them. The occasion was Huber's 100th birthday and dozens of
her beloved students whom she'd taught nearly 60 years earlier
gathered to celebrate the milestone. Seeing her students whom
she taught Latin, math and social science, was the greatest pleasure
she said she could have and because it was a surprise, "tripled
the joy." Mary Esser Drow, 72, of Arizona, organized her
Class of 1945 from St. Mary's Academy in Prairie du Chien, Wisconsin,
55th reunion to coincide with Huber's 100th birthday. Another
student commented that Huber, who was also celebrating her 75
years of service as a School Sister of Notre Dame, hasn't forgotten
anyone.
New web
site aids planning
Planet Alumni's new, free web site can make planning and attending
a class reunion easier.
Greg Rohrbacher, Olive Branch, Mississippi, turned to the web
to locate more than 300 former Lake Park High (IL) School Class
of 1968 classmates who had scattered from Florida to Alaska from
their suburban Chicago. One of the tools he used was Planet Alumni,
www.planetalumni.com. "There's one section to post reunions,
dates and location," Rohrbacher said. "That was a big
help." Reunion planners
can search for classmates on Planet Alumni, send online invitations,
RSVP, post photo albums and see who is confirmed to attend. Many reunion
coordinators report that one of the hardest parts about planning
a reunion is collecting money. An e-commerce section is being
added to provide a safe, quck way to pay for tickets. Reunion
planners will be able to to sell event tickets and class merchandise. Web sites
like Planet Alumni provide tips for planning a successful reunion
and detailed information about reunion committee responsibilities.
Information includes a two year timetable right up to Reunion
Day; how to get seed money; how to determine expenses and build
them into a ticket price; cash saving tips; and a sample biography
questionnaire. The success
of Planet Alumni led to creation of two sister sites, www.militaryconnections.com
and www.greekalumni.com.
These sites also offer reunion planning services. In the past,
about 20% of graduates never learned about reunions because no
one could find them. Today the Internet and sites like Planet
Alumni bring together classmates faster than ever. Check www.planetalumni.com.
Giving
back
Bill Williams, a frequent contributor to this magazine and searcher
extraordinaire for the Warren (OH) High School Class of 1948,
regularly talks to school superintendents. He reminds superintendents
that many high school class reunions try to give something back
to the school; software, computers, projectors, scholarship money.
"That seems reason enough for school administrators to encourage
reunions," suggests Williams.
The card's
in the mail ... a very kind remembrance
Bill Williams reports that he took large computer generated get
well cards to his 50th class reunion for classmates too ill to
attend. Class members signed them and shared some thoughts. The
classmates who received the cards wrote comments about how much
they enjoyed hearing from everyone and the therapy it provided
by looking up those at the reunion in the yearbook.
IDEAS
Awards
for reunions
Few reunions miss the opportunity to award special people and
deeds. Members of the National Association of Reunion Managers
(NARM) are responsible for these suggestions. First or Last to
Register, Biggest Lottery Winner, First to Retire, Best Brush
with Greatness Story, Turned Out Just as Expected, Still Drives
(or is still restoring) the Same Car, and Lives Closest to School.
NARM member, Kathe Murphy, Classy Reunions, Inc., Sandpoint, Idaho,
has contributed (sometimes dubiously) to this list for us in the
past and offers these additions. Never Left Home, Never Married,
Woman with the Youngest Husband and Most Body Piercing.
High reunion
thoughts
Howard Bresnik, Buffalo Grove, Illinois, shared some of his 35th
reunion organizing thoughts which we decided deserved passing
along. Bresnik organizes a multi-class reunion of Niles (IL) East,
West, and North High Schools. They have separate functions then
co-mingle for the last two hours.
Bresnik laments
that tracking down some of his multi-married female classmates
is a challenge. To start he tried Switchboard and BigYellow which he
says, "is often useful." If someone has an AOL account,
"I can sometimes find them there."
Bresnik fronts
deposits until money comes in and keeps on planning. One of his
classmates set up www.WebReunions.com
to use for their database. Their reunion booklet will be downloadable
from the site, so they won’t have to publish it.
At the reunion,
they introduce all the graduates who stand and are acknowledged.
They sing school songs, have a trivia quiz with prizes and entertainment
from talented classmates.
Finally,
Bresnik describes his elevation to reunion organizer as a "divine
right!" He says he’ll plan reunions "every five
years until my wife leaves me."
Book review
Planning
Your High School Reunion by Rhonda Teel & Kim McElliott.
(1995, 159 pages, paperback. Montage Publishing, 13501 100th Ave
NE, Ste 5047, Kirkland WA 98034; $18.45 inc s/h)
This compact
little tome includes lots of ideas, hints and information for
class reunion organizers. Starting with meetings and what should
be accomplished, the authors use the expertise of about 100 high
school reunions that they've planned as The Reunion Company in
Redlands, California. Illustrations aid copy but we were disappointed
to find no resources or ideas for persons wanting to go beyond
the book – which we feel is essential in successful reunion
organizing.
Roll away
the stone
Here's a grave idea. A funeral
director donated a vault to the Minerva, Ohio, High School Class
of 1980 to be opened on their 20th reunion in the year 2000, the
month of June, to be specific.
A ghoulish
affair? 'Fraid not. "It
was a lot of fun," remembered class member Lisa Dunlap. Into
the vault went school memorabilia: cap and gown, the valedictory
speech, a spiral-bound notebook with student predictions for the
future, even a bottle of wine for a reunion toast. As planned,
the vault was opened in June, 20 years after graduation. "It
was really neat," enthused Dunlap. Unfortunately, some water
leaked in, and there was damage, even though everything had been
packed in plastic. "We salvaged most of it, though,"
Dunlap said.
The items
generated lots of interest during the class reunion. So much,
in fact, that Dunlap said classmates were going to bury more memorabilia
for their 45th reunion.
Can you dig
it?
Bright
ideas!
Anita (Capron) Dehghani e-mailed a suggestion that alumni groups
contact the local high school district offices to be added to
their web sites. Dehghani says this should be a beneficial arrangement
and would make a cooperative alumni Internet environment for graduates.
Dehghani2000@Worldnet.att.net
Sheila Skaggs
Hale reports that the Brazosport High School, Freeport, Texas,
Class of '62 sponsored a "60s Party," rather than the
traditional class reunion. Many Class of '62 classmates married
folks from classes ahead or behind their own. A 60s party seemed
like a way to get more people interested and involved and they
hope to make it an annual event.
A second
party at the beach included people representing classes from 1957
to 1972 from as far away as California and England! Technology
has enhanced their ability to reconnect with classmates, Hale
reported. They maintain an on-line directory and several other
web pages which can be viewed from links on http://members.aol.com/sheilahale/yearbook/index.htm.
In a recent
discussion, Paula Sheagley said she often teases that the "perfect
side-business" for her reunion company would be a REUNION
PREPARATION CENTER! Imagine the amount of money spent for this
once every five- or ten-year event! There is not only the cost
for one or two people to travel to this big event plus lodging.
Attendees shop for the perfect flattering outfit to wear with
impressive accessories, plus the women need a new hair-do, and
for heaven sakes ..... don't forget the trip to the tanning parlor
for a couple of months and a new set of acrylic nails!! On top
of all of this ..... they pay reunion costs and buy mementos (memory
books, class pictures, t-shirts). And bar costs. Reunions are
known for high bar tabs, probably second to none.
Hay! Classmates
had fun
by Pat Fridgen
"Hi Ho Silver!" was the theme of the Canby, Minnesota,
25th high school class reunion held on the 25th of the month.
The Western
theme included red and white checked tablecloths at a dinner of
chicken and ribs though the organizer said she just couldn't go
with baked beans. A musical classmate wrote a song of reminiscing
to the tune of "Oklahoma," our school play. And denim
was the dress code.
The crowning
touch, was an afternoon get-together for classmates, spouses and
children. We were treated to a hayride through town on a wagon.
You can get away with this in a small farming community where
the streets are nearly deserted at midday. The hay wagon re-appeared
at the site of the dinner and program. Forty classmates tried
to get up gracefully on or around the bales for a group photo.
One-third
of the Class of 1973 plus spouses attended this reunion. The goal
of the next reunion, as always, is a 100% turn-out of folks who
may be middle-aged physically but young at heart.
Sure to
be hits
1. Plan a tour of your alma mater. Our hayride ended at
the high school where a staff member supervised our visit. Except
for classmates who continue to live in Canby, few had been back
to the school since graduation. What a bunch of kids we suddenly
became. Memories flooded back. We remembered the oddest details,
laughed and commiserated over campus experiences. It was fascinating
to explore every nook and cranny of the building. The staff person
grinned through it all and asked if the school looked smaller.
"Yes!" was the resounding reply.
2. Prepare
a master list of classmates' addresses. This may be expensive
and cumbersome for large classes but could be one or two pages
for some schools. E-mail addresses are also desirable and should
be requested on RSVP cards.
3. Invite
teachers as honored guests and pay for their meals. People
are interested in what has become of faculty, especially those
who have retired. At reunions student-teacher relationships become
friend-friend.
4. Track
down classmates who moved away before graduation, even those
who left in the elementary grades. This can be a real challenge.
At the reunion everyone can brainstorm names of lost friends and
collect any known information on their whereabouts. Recruit an
ambitious volunteer to continue to gather addresses over the next
five years (or whenever the next reunion is). Lost friends will
be flattered to be found and remembered and it will make for good
visiting. We caught up on news with two such friends.
5. Share
organizing chores which tend to fall on those who live in
the old hometown. But with today's ease of communication, even
those who live farther can effectively do some of the work (compiling
biography booklets, planning entertainment).
The older we get, the more nostalgic we become for the good old
days of our youth. These tips can help make great the reunion
that reunites us with those who shared that special time in our
lives.
About
the author
Pat Fridgen, former weekly newspaper editor, is now a freelance
writer and mom to five children, ages 4-16. Her husband Joel's
job brought them from Minnesota to Pennsylvania, so reunions have
added importance.
Another
class checks in ...
Gretchen Henney, Cynthiana, Kentucky, reported about her Oldham
County, Kentucky, High School reunion. "Creating funds was
a big problem, but in the end and with a fairly steep admission
price we were able to cover our costs. We asked for donations
and a couple of us footed the upfront cost and were paid back
after the reunion. We wanted to be close to the town we graduated
from, so many people have places to stay."
"We
had a cocktail party the first night with dancing and a great
meal. We held a silent auction and donated proceeds to a local
charity. We showed a graduation video, had a memorabilia table
with pictures of classmates who had died since graduation and
a 'where are they now' book for people who couldn't attend. On
Sunday we had a picnic so people could bring their families.
"We
made name tags with high school pictures on them. Our class wasn't
shy and everyone jumped right in. We have a couple of people on
the committee who want to organize the next reunion.
"We
are still making our reunion traditions. The name tags went over
well. The auction was a big hit. Our memorabilia table will have
more next time."
Hot ideas
Here're some great tips we learned from the National Association
of Reunion Managers (NARM).
Check
those checks.
An easy way to get more information about reunion attendees is
examine their payment checks. You can get important information
for the next reunion if you do the planning. Many checks have
social security and phone numbers and spouse's names that you
may not have.
Who set
fire to the boy's locker room in our senior year?
When it's time to serve a buffet, instead of calling table numbers,
a fun way to get a buffet line started is a trivia contest. Whoever
jumps up with the correct answer first gets first table position
to chow down. By the time the next question is asked and answered
correctly, it's time for another table to get in line, and so
on. Make sure questions aren't so hard that no one knows the answer
or so easy that the entire room is likely to jump up at once.
It's also a great way to keep everyone entertained while they're
waiting their turn.
Memory
book sparklers:
Sometimes the MOST important thing a classmate can offer a reunion
is volunteering for a project. The memory book, for example. If
you're the volunteer, you'll likely end up with a wonderful product
and a triumph for your class to boot! Nancy Paris
Howser, member of the Urbana High School, Urbana, Illinois, Class
of 1951, is one such volunteer. She was afraid the committee might
stick to a questionnaire with "the same old tired questions,
eliciting the same old tired answers."
Howser sought
questions she called "sparklers." Her questions started
with the usual stuff; name, spouse, address, kids, job/profession.
Then, she continued.
What have
you done in the five years since the last reunion?
What pushed
you to choose your life's work?
In the past
50 years, what events have meant most to you? What have
you learned in the past 50 years? How have
you changed since 1951? What gets
you up in the morning? What makes
you smile? What makes
you happy? What gives
you the greatest satisfaction? What do you
remember about one or two of your classmates (nothing embarrassing,
please)? What do you
remember about a teacher (that we can print)? What is your
philosophy? What are
your words of wisdom? What do you
plan to do now? Howser concedes
that the reunion committee must approve. She thinks, however,
if they do agree, this might be an interesting booklet for a change.
The Urbana High School Class of 1951 50th reunion will be September
28-29, 2001.
Class
reunion awards
by Kathe Murphy
Traveled the farthest ... Big Hair ... Most Unusual Career ...
Giving awards at high school class reunions is a BIG must do.
All class reunions need a program. Most commonly classmates get
a microphone and engage the group with class-specific memories,
insights, illusions or delusions. The reunion committee decides
which awards to give and the "flavor." Sensitive? Afraid
that the "Most Changed" award could be hurtful? You
may not want to give the "Married Most Times" award. Awards can
be a big hairy deal! One class committee just gave "Hair"
awards because they had one male classmate with new woven hair
and they wanted to be sure he got recognized. "Hair Awards"
that were used included: No Hair, Big Hair, Same Hair, New Hair,
Gray Hair and Hair-that-Traveled-the-Farthest. Censored:
Got a classmate who has always been full-of-it? One 30 year class
reunion gave a shoe box of doggy do (old and dried up, thankfully)
to the honored classmate. I'm still
looking for the class that will give the "Woman with the
Youngest Husband" award. Somehow it's not even cute the other
way around – a
double standard for sure. Use Senior
Prom designations instead of "the usual." King, Queen,
Biggest Flirt, Still Most Likely to Succeed. Use your noodle ...
anything goes. Presentation
can be Oscar-like with two different classmates giving each award;
draw more classmates to the podium (circumvent old cliques). A
handsome bald man can give a Hair Award (I like hair awards) and
classmates-married-the-longest can give the Newest Newlywed award. Who gets
which award? Design your registration forms to collect "quantitative"
information to present Most Children, Youngest Child, Oldest Child,
Married Longest, and Newest Newlywed awards. Then there are always
qualitative awards, such as Changed the Least or Biggest Beer
Belly. The all-knowing omnipotent reunion committee can simply
choose who gets these awards or the class can take nominations
from the floor and do an "applause-meter" vote. You
might want to limit the number of nominations from the floor.
If giving an Eligible Bachelor/Bachelorette Award, ask nominees
to the microphone to present "campaign platforms." Tradition
aside, being able to laugh at ourselves is what this award gig
is really about. About
the author
Kathe Murphy's Idaho-based, Classy Reunions, Inc. was founded
in 1988 and is a member of the National Association of Reunion
Managers. The author's company makes award ribbons (rosettes with
class-personalized streamers, $40 for 10 Awards in 2 school colors).
There are 30 awards to choose from or make up your own. Call 1-800-544-0194
or e-mail reunions@netw.com.
Alumknights
on the web
Alumni of Bishop Kelly High School, Boise, Idaho, have established
a web site (www.alumknights.org) featuring alumni activities,
information about the annual golf tournament and 3 on 3 basketball
hoop. The histories of these events are chronicled, as is the
BKAA tradition of annual scholarships for incoming freshmen. The heart
of the web site is the message board for "alumknights."
Some classes have used the message board extensively. Each class
has a separate section including a list of "missing"
classmates. Additional features are sections for each graduating
class and hyperlinks to web pages featuring BK grads. There are
links to famous alumni like actor William Petersen‚ '72,
Pulitzer-Prize winning cartoonist Mike Luckovich‚ '78, and
Jim Potter‚ '91, who is playing professional basketball in
Belgium and to those less than famous. Sherilyn
Orr‚ Class of '87, masterminded development of the site through
her company Infofuel Productions in Boise.
Internet
tool makes reunion registration painless
Most Senior Class Presidents enjoy planning their 10-year reunion.
For St. Francis High School, Mountain View, California, alumna
Kelly Lang, it was becoming a nightmare. The phone calls and e-mails
to monitor, registering those who respond by mail and sorting
through information to compile daily reports was overbearing.
Working full-time, Lang realized the reunion was going to take
much more time than she planned. Until she found the online registration
tool, Register4.com (SM).
Working with
Internet data-based registration software, Lang eliminated much
of the manual work associated with managing reunions.
Lang's first
step was to create a web site where alumni could register. "Creating
my Reunion web site was easy! I just followed the simple interview
on the site creation engine and it was done. I sent invitations
by mail, included the web site on the invitation and forwarded
the reunion web site link in all of my e-mails," said Lang.
The result
is a very complete registration web site providing pertinent information
about the reunion, hotel accommodations, parking, city information,
travel information, survey questions and much more. One can include
any information on their web site.
"Having
a reunion web site to register attendees was wonderful,"
Lang said. "I was able to contact people I had incorrect
addresses for. Others forwarded e-mail to people they knew had
not received an invitation."
Register4.com
uses a live database, allowing Lang to create and view live reports
at any time. "I didn't have to compile reports and update
daily. By eliminating data entry and manual reporting, I saved
so much time," said Lang. Register4.com requires no installation
and hosts the web site for you. The only requirement is Internet
access.
Register4.com
buries the assumption that managing a reunion takes time creating
daily reports, data entry and a lot of money. It is designed for
novice computer users, saves time and is cost-effective. For more
information on Register4.com, the Ultimate Registration Tool,
call Kelly Casey, 877-734-4266 (877-REG4COM) or visit the web
site at http://www.register4.com.
ADVICE
What
are reunions?
These are Thomas Jordan's observations of his Queen Street High
School Reunion in Beaufort, North Carolina. "All of the old
reasons for reunions were present like 'chasing yesterday,' renewing
old friendships and acquaintances, networking and reliving yesteryear.
...We hope that the high school reunions will be remembered as
opportunities for us to offer a glimpse of who we were and what
we are when we are at our best."
A great
solution: recruit high school seniors
Bill Williams, Hampton, Virginia, has a long, successful history
of finding all his classmates (REUNIONS MAGAZINE, Autumn 1997,
"Found everyone!"). He's made these suggestions to the
superintendent for Newport News, Virginia, Schools. He says high
schools should organize a small, core group of seniors from each
graduating senior class who are willing to serve as gatekeepers
for tracking graduates and be the nucleus for reunion planning.
"Kids today are already wired so the task of keeping up with
life changes of moves, marriages, careers and other events is
easier. To try and play catch-up say five or ten, or even twenty-five
years downstream is too big a hurdle. The payoff to the schools
and community is having better attended reunions and more involvement,"
reports Williams.
How to
survive (and enjoy!) your class reunion
by Lynette Norris Wilkinson
Some people approach their class reunion with anticipation, others
with reservation. But almost everyone feels a slight twinge of
the jitters, a nervous energy that says, "Hey! Something
special is about to happen in my life."
Your reservations
are made and bags packed. Don't forget the right attitude and
these helpful tips, and you'll have a great time!
How do
you handle awkward situations where someone you do not recognize,
recognizes you?
Before the reunion, flip through your yearbook to reacquaint yourself
with faces. Many reunion planners use nametags with old school
photos which removes a lot of the guesswork. But if you call someone
by the wrong name or just forget their name, it's a common reunion
problem. Besides, if they recognize you, that means you've not
changed much. Be proud!
Hopefully,
your reunion planner will plan activities for everyone. If not,
try to find your spouse and kids a 'reunion buddy.' Beth Davis,
owner of Reunions By The Party People in Dallas, Texas, suggests
you introduce your spouse to another non-classmate to share conversation
and your kids to kids their age. If your spouse prefers to pass
on a particular reunion event, don't force it.
How are
10-year, 25-year and 50-year high school reunions different?
Everyone agrees that the ten-year high school reunion is definitely
the 'show off' reunion. Most class members have been out of school
a few years and are on a career track. They're anxious to show
off their accomplishments. Peter Zarter, a representative with
Taylor Reunion Services in Dallas, Texas, says, "At the ten-year
reunion, they are definitely out to impress. At the 20-year reunion,
they are not out so much to impress because many have arrived.
They're just at the reunion to have a good time." Reunions
of 30 years and older, he said, generally have more school spirit,
more fond memories. Those at 10-year reunions haven't been out
of school long enough and things haven't changed that much. "Fifty-year
reunions are kind of sad," he added, "because they realize
this may probably be the last time they will see some of these
people."
What should
I do about people I didn't get along with in school?
Beth Davis says, "Be nice and approach them. Include them
in your group." Give them the benefit of the doubt, they
may have changed. Even if they haven't, you'll feel better for
taking the initiative.
What should
I wear?
"Go with simple," suggests Beth Davis. "Don't overdo
it but look hot!" You want to look good, but you also want
to be comfortable. Check scheduled events and plan your wardrobe
accordingly. What kind
of pictures should I take?
Get lots of close-ups and candids. "Get facial shots of people
you care about," says Gila Monfort, owner of Reunion Consultants
in Dallas. "A long shot of people on the dance floor isn't
going to tell you much later." Take some pictures on Friday
and have them developed overnight to display on Saturday. Or bring
them to display at the next reunion. Get duplicates to share with
people in the picture — another way to keep in touch and
share memories.
What are
some must-haves to take along?
Besides your camera, pack your yearbook. During a break you might
be able to figure out a familiar face that's been puzzling you.
You might also want to bring pictures of where you live, your
family, hobbies and snapshots taken of you through the years,
things that connect the person they knew to the person you are
now.
How do
you keep in touch after the reunion?
Class officers should do an annual postcard mailing. Just say
"Hi. Are you still there?" If you mail them once a year,
they will still go to a forwarding address if the person has moved.
Annual newsletters and directories with addresses and names of
spouses and children also help. Giselle Fisher, owner of GG's
Wedding and Event Planning in Dallas, recommends that classmates
who live close plan a local annual event like a picnic to keep
friendships alive.
How can
I make our next reunion more successful?
First, consider the time of year. Summer and fall months will
usually give you better participation. Winter months are not as
good because everyone is busier. Older groups often prefer autumn
because it's not as hot and they have leisure time to take off.
They may also want the reunion to coincide with the school homecoming.
"And consider using a professional planner," adds Peter
Zarter. "Most people don't realize how much time, expense,
and searching is involved, and how difficult it is to do themselves.
They usually call right around February when they become overwhelmed
and want to know what we can do to help."
About
the author
Lynette Norris Wilkinson is an award-winning technical writer
who has written newspaper and magazine articles, as well as published
a children's book. She lives in Dallas, Texas, with her husband,
Antonio Wilkinson, Sr., and eight-year-old son, Antonio, Jr.
E-mail
reunion advice
We have the good fortune to "talk" with reunion organizers
across the land via e-mail. We look forward to more such "conversations"
and encourage you to share your ideas, suggestions, questions,
concerns and reunion joys! at reunions@execpc.com. One such
"conversation" was with Nancy Morris McNayr, Class of
'72, Lawton Senior High School, Lawton, Oklahoma. Nancy e-mailed,
"We are working on our 25-year reunion and the committee
continues to 'develop.' The number and makeup of members has changed
to make the committee more effective. We use the experience of
reunions we attend as well as ideas from classes before and after
ours. "Every
class reunion has some event or happening which we learn from
– either to imitate or to not try at all. When the core committee
first met, we had a lot of "what have you experienced"
discussions. Believe me, not every high school reunion is a fun
thing to go to." Nancy shares
these problems and solutions.
1. Can't
talk to each other – too dark, too noisy. One problem
we'd all experienced was right after dinner the lights go off,
the music goes up and you're stuck if you don't dance. I'm not
fond of our first solution to hold the dance in an adjoining room.
Two sets of double doors connected the rooms so you can see in
and mill between the rooms. Next we are going to try having a
very big room with dancing at one end. Hope it works. 2. Music
– At our earlier reunions we played popular music of the
day. People did not seem to "get in the mood." Then
we realized that playing music popular when we were in high school
did the trick. Hits from high school provided just the nostalgic
feeling everyone was looking for. 3. Paying
for drinks – We think it's kind of tacky to pay $40-50
for an event and then be expected to pay $2-3 for drinks. Even
cokes! Our committee provides all drinks but we limit liquor to
beer and wine. We also discovered that finger foods after the
meal keep people at the party. 4. Have
a real program – The last high school reunion I attended
had a five-minute program thanking people for being there and
acknowledging those who came from afar. Period. A program helps
connect classmates and feel like they got their moneys worth. 5. Ice
breaking – Even though we are adults, everyone still
finds it hard to go up to others and strike up a converstion.
Some of the committee members should be in charge of circulating
and saying, "Hey Bob, do you remember John? Come over and
say Hi!" This gets conversations started. It doesn't take
long before many people are talking and having a good time. 6. Not
staying – Some classmates don't feel they fit in. Give
them a job. "You can't leave, I need someone to help hand
out the awards." Or any job that makes them feel part of
something – even clean-up detail.
Advice
from a pro'
by Kathe Murphy of Classy Reunions, Inc, Sandpoint, Idaho
Respect confidentiality
We always place public service announcements (PSAs) in area newspapers
about upcoming reunions. A missing classmate may see it and call.
PSAs as well as mailings open the door to a barrage of calls from
people looking for others. I'm cautious
about who's on the phone. It brings up the whole question of confidentiality.
Is this person a bill collector? An abusive ex-boyfriend? Or a
dear old buddy? It's important
to promote reunion attendance and, of course, we want people to
be in touch with one another. After all, our main goal is to bring
people together. We require that callers send a letter to the
classmate and we forward it immediately. The looked-for classmate
can decide to respond. Once memory books are distributed at reunions,
names and addresses become a matter of public domain. We never
print phone numbers. One angry attendee thought we sold a reunion
list to a mortgage company. The culprit was an ambitious classmate
who used the memory book for leads. Anyone who
does not want information printed should contact the committee
or company planning the reunion. Offer an opportunity (a box on
the form) for people to be "unpublished." What do
I wear to my reunion?
Questions of fashion are the most frequently asked and among the
most difficult to answer. A reunion shouldn't be an event for
which you absolutely must buy something new. Some people can't
afford something new. (Kurt Vonnegut cautioned wariness "of
anything that requires new clothes.") On the other hand,
there are few events for which we dress up anymore. It's kinda
fun. Many women seem to like having an occasion to dress up and
we see everything from gold lamé to cowboy boots. Men have
it easier. We rarely see suits, rather nice shirts and slacks
are the rule. It's helpful
to include a statement of "dress code" as a guide. We've
said dress casually; summer resort attire, dress classy...no ties
required; shorts or jeans depending upon the weather, summer casual
or come as you want. Evening boat
cruises probably require a sweater ... or sell reunion sweatshirts
when it gets chilly. Or, come dressed in nautical school colors. Two reliable
dressing tips. 1) Watch the weather and dress accordingly. 2)
Wear what makes you feel best. Classy
Reunions, Inc. is a member of the National Association of Reunion
Managers.
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