Qs? & As!

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Carol Riley, a regular contributor to this column received and responded to the following dilemma.

Question??

Michael C. Gergel, New Boston, Michigan, writes “I am on a reunion committee and we received this question from a classmate. Is it typical to invite former classmates who did NOT graduate with us? Other classmates are asking the same question.

   “Some schools say yes, others say no. For example, Fort Ashby High School Class of 1973 committee decided to invite any class member during their sophomore, junior and/or senior year but may not have graduated with the class. Other schools invite classmates from years before and after to attend.

   “We have made no distinction between those who graduated and those who moved or did not graduate from Napoleon High School. I was invited to my high school reunion at another school I attended from kindergarten through 8th grades.

   “Is there tradition about this or is it up to the committee?”

Answer!!

   Riley, owner of Reunions Unlimited, Olympia, Washington, and member of the National Association of Reunion Managers (NARM), answers.

   We invite, and add to the list, anyone who was a member of that class anytime in their life. As children and teens, it was not usually our decision or first choice to go to another school, move or even drop out because of difficult personal circumstances or health. Sometimes classmates do not actually graduate until the year after if they needed summer school or a few extra credits. 

   We do not typically formally invite those from the year ahead or the year behind but if they ask and want to pay that is fine with us. They must have had a strong association with the class. We never let anyone from the class or any other class attend without paying!

Ask the experts

Answers from the experts

   We found this dilemma about a 50th class reunion somewhat universal for all reunions. Therefore, any class reunion organizer will find intriguing ideas from these experts. We turned, yet again, to members of the National Association of Reunion Managers (NARM), who make their livings organizing class reunions. They are paid to keep reunions from boredom.
    Nikki Anderson, Reunion Specialists, Inc., Carlsbad, California wrote that several classes she’s working with invited a representative from the high school to do a “then and now” presentation. They included things like school enrollment, number of staff, classrooms, parking spaces. One class invited a school group (band, dance team) to perform. This season they have several classes doing Sunday events that include a “Day at the Races.”  Football or baseball games with tailgate parties are also popular.
   Deirdre Marvin, ReunionTeam.com, Vernon Hills, Illinois,reported “a big hit at an older classmates” reunion. The reunion committee made a contribution to the high school and their marching band made an appearance at the reunion playing the school fight song as they marched into the ballroom. Cheerleaders, pom-pom squad or flags add to the presentation. If space does not allow a marching band, a jazz band is a smaller alternative. It makes for a very festive and fun presentation.
   Carol Riley, Owner of Reunions Unlimited in Olympia, Washington and past president of NARM, suggests that reunion attendees have expectations and like to have a format to follow. They expect to have one main dinner event which can be changed by having a theme party (’50s, Hawaiian, etc.) and/or a change in menu (BBQ, pig roast or international food stations).
   Keep the golf, Riley says, open it to women and move it to Friday afternoon, followed by an informal cocktail party open to all golfers and non-golfers. Or have an informal non-alcoholic reception at the school. On Saturday, “nix the school tour if the school has not had a remodel.”
   Cancel the DJ at the main event. Keep the program short, skip the skits and pass around a cordless mike from table to table for classmate introductions. Or maybe offer an open mike for anyone who wishes to share something with the entire group.
   Put together a slide show from kindergarten through the 50th year reunion. Make a video or CD of it and offer it for sale.
   For a donation, ask current cheerleaders, majorettes or band to perform, adding to the excitement of the event. They run in dressed in school colors with pom-poms, mascot included, and do some cheers or songs. They may also sing or play the school anthem.
   Don’t do individual photos. One large group shot is fine and offers classmates a chance to mingle. Or take it a step further and break down into grade school groups.
   Offer something totally unique on Sunday. If you live close to a large body of water, secure a large boat (walk-on ferry or something similar), bring onboard light finger food and a bar and go out for a three-hour cruise.
   Chris Clishe in Riley’s office, who is midway to her 50-year reunion, suggests an additional event after the reunion. Work with a cruise line or vacation center and offer a class cruise or trip a day or two after the reunion weekend, giving classmates a longer and less scheduled chance to be together.
   And finally, Riley makes a surprising conclusion that finding missing classmates is easy. The answer? Hire a NARM reunion professional in your area!
   Beth A. Miller is president of Reunited, Inc. in Weston, Florida. She gave careful consideration to the reader’s question to do a golden anniversary reunion a little differently from past reunions.
   First, I’d suggest shortening the menu of events to two— at most three. On Friday, a “happy hour” ice-breaker at a local bar or club may be a nice change. It can be done inexpensively by starting early before the “regular” crowd arrives. Try to arrange a drink special (ie: 2-for-1, a drink named for the school mascot for a reduced price or even one hour of open bar) whatever the establishment is willing to provide in exchange for an early-arriving crowd. Ask the establishment to provide hors d’oeuvres and light munchies. Remind management reunion attendees are mainly there to see old friends and not to consume the free drink and leave. Such an event could also provide publicity for the establishment and expose it to potential new and repeat customers.
   For the Saturday “big event,” why not change things a bit and dress down, make it casual, they’ve done the dress-up thing before. Take it a step further and ask alumni to dress in school colors. It’s pretty cool to still have spirit after all of those years. Add to the spirit by having a trivia contest throughout the night. Give the DJ/emcee a list of questions about old hang-outs, teachers, who had what kind of car, who was voted best dressed, Homecoming King, etc. Provide token prizes or maybe divide the group into “teams,” for a team prize. Solicit token prizes from local businesses.
   Offer an informal Sunday event for the “die-hards,” such as a poolside gathering. Anyone who wants to can order lunch or drinks on their own and it doesn’t raise the ticket price.
   Put extra thought into the content of events and really bring people back to the “good ‘ol days” without the pressure of big ticket prices and fancy outfits.

LOOKING FOR AWARDS AND PRIZES?

 Adria Lopour, Colorado Springs, Colorado, is thinking way ahead for fun prize ideas for a 20-year high school reunion. She feels this is a part of the reunion that could really use some help because "Our first three reunions were BORING."
  She searched the web and found a few great ideas but wants lots more. When she asked, we said we'd ask our readers for suggestions-but only if she shared the ones she's already collected. These are the ideas Adria already has, plus appropriate gifts for these awards.

Most gray hair
Least hair (prize: a comb)
Most changed
Farthest traveled
Most kids (prize: a bottle of aspirin)
Lives closest to the school (prize: a world map)
Most dangerous job (prize: a will kit or visit to local attorney)
Most recent baby
Lived in the most places
Most recent grandparent
Most or highest degrees (who couldn't stop going to school?)
Most eligible
Most exciting or interesting job
Classmates who have served in the military

Ask the experts
   Again, we have a provocative question for the experts. This email is from Sandy, Butler High School Class of 1997 reunion, Augusta, Georgia. Responses are from members of the National Association of Reunion Managers (NARM).
Q?    I have just begun to organize the reunion and it occurred to me that more people might respond than I expect, leaving the possibility that we might have surplus money when we finish. Any ideas for "leftover" money collected for this high school reunion?
A!   Everyone agreed with Debby Pattin & Carol Riley, owners of Reunions Unlimited, Olympia, Washington, and Denise Silva, President of Great Reunions, Garden Grove, California, who say if you’re lucky enough to have a surplus, you can save the money as seed money for the next reunion or donate it to your school.
   Kirsten Richardson, Reunions With Class, Inc., Bellevue, Washington, cautions that surpluses “can be a hassle to track, report interest to the IRS and manage the account if it is small (banks like to charge fees for small accounts).”
   Joe Smith of Back to the Future Reunions, Pleasanton, California, suggests having the account set up legally with a CPA to prevent trouble on a number of fronts, including the possibility that something happens to the person in charge of the account. After the account is set up and the reunion is a memory, “wait three to four months to be sure all the bills have been paid and no one is requesting a refund for any reason. Once you are sure the money left is really ‘extra’ money, then start thinking about what to do.”
   If you use the money for start-up funds for the next reunion, there are some pitfalls. Who controls the money? Is it in a bank account and who has access? Is the person who has control of the money going to want to plan the next reunion? As shocking as it may seem, some reunion chairmen have moved away and taken the funds with them. If a great deal of money is involved, safety precautions should be explored.
Linda Wright and Jim O'Gorman, Keep In Touch Reunions LLC, St. Charles, Missouri, exclaimed: “WOW! What a great problem to have! You could give the money to your high school as a 'thank you' gift from your class. Pinpoint it for a special use, say for technology or library. We give committees an option of adding a dollar or two to their ticket price for just this purpose.
   The money can be used to buy door prizes. By a day or two before the reunion you should know if you will have extra funds. Door prizes can be given at the dinner dance or be used to help boost attendance for a Sunday event which is usually less well-attended. Or give the money itself as a door prize and call it a ticket refund.
   Nancy Shirey at A+ Reunion in Ellicott City, Maryland, suggests offering a cordials bar after dinner or door prizes. Create a calendar with pictures of events from reunion weekend, offers Frances Farlow, Reunions For U, Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Or participate in an adopt-a-family for Thanksgiving or Christmas.
   Put the money toward what Darla Methey, Reunions By Design, El Cajon, California, calls memorabilia enhancements. “Sometimes committees rent mannequins to display prom dresses or outfits of the era (from wigs to shoes). Or consider these ideas that don't require a lot of lead time — reimburse committee members' tickets, award a prize to the first person to RSVP or pay for faculty tickets.
   In preparation for our ten-year reunion, we discovered we had never spent the high school funds our class president placed in a savings account,” Michelle Webber, Administrative Assistant for NARM in Canby, Oregon wrote. “We had over $1500 to spend for our first reunion. We used half to reduce the per-person ticket cost for alumni from $60 to $40. I believe this helped increase reunion attendance.”
   Jonathan Miller, Reunited, Inc., Weston, Florida, added some new ideas. Project your estimated windfall and purchase a keepsake item to give out at the reunion or as a post-reunion thank-you for attending. Create a fund to subsidize tickets for classmates who feel they can't otherwise afford to attend the reunion. Create a scholarship fund to recognize a current/upcoming graduate of your school or support a worthy program at your school or in your school community. Or you can upgrade your catering menu or offer a complimentary cocktail.

We posed this question to the experts. Following are several responses from professional class reunion organizers, members of the National Association of Reunion Managers.

Q? We have teachers who want to come to our reunion. Do WE pay for them as our guests? Or do they pay for themselves? Do we charge a lower price? We went to a small private school, and fewer than 60 people will attend, plus about 15 teachers (if they ALL come). Please advise.
A! Tony Ricketts, Golden State Reunions, Carlsbad, California, recommends inviting teachers to attend these events absolutely free: Friday night icebreaker, Sunday family picnic and a pre-reunion reception hour. Jonathan Miller, Reunited, Inc, Weston, Florida, suggests that the reunion committee might want to invite a truly special faculty member as a guest of the class, covering costs for the teacher and his/her guest.
   Few teachers attend reunions, according to Greg Hollander, Class Encounters, Sacramento, California. "Most want to visit, but don't want to come for dinner. Teachers aren't charged for attending unless they want to eat, in which case they are charged only the cost of the dinner or the committee pays for dinners."
" Frances Farlow, Reunions For U, Baton Rouge, Louisiana, said "I would invite teachers (by phone call, personal notes or posted flyers) and offer a price that covers all per-person facility charges but does not include the cost of putting on the event, printing, mailing, searching, entertainment or decorations
Deirdre Marvin, ReunionTeam.com, Houston, Texas, says if you are inviting your "Honored Faculty" to come and reminisce with your class, the class pays for them. For those looking to cut reunion costs, we recommend they invite faculty to the Friday night mixer, if they are having one; hors d'oeuvres or snacks are much less expensive than dinner.
   "Normally we charge teachers half the normal ticket price," said Gina Charrlin, Blast From The Past Reunions, Albuquerque, New Mexico. "Large numbers of faculty are usually charged full price. Otherwise you'll have to cover costs another way; find a business to sponsor the reunion or ask alums to donate to a 'Teachers' Ticket Fund.'"
   Joseph W. Smith, Back to the Future Reunions, Division of Red Jester Enterprises, Inc, Pleasanton, California, says "one option is to incorporate teachers' costs into the overall per-person ticket price. When no special price arrangements are made for teachers, we send an open letter of invitation to faculty and staff wishing to attend. This also informs the school of reunion arrangements in case they receive any inquiries."
   As far as paying for teachers, Linda Wright & Jim O'Gorman, Keep In Touch Reunions LLC, St. Charles Missouri, have seen it all. "Some reunion committees pay out-of-pocket for the teachers' tickets. Some apportion the cost of the anticipated number of teachers to classmates' ticket price. Others ask teachers to pay for tickets at full or reduced price."
   Janice Masciarelli, Reunion Central, Bear, Delaware, reports that most of her clients offer faculty members a lower ticket price, usually limited to the per-person banquet cost. Carolyn Moore, Reunion Planners of Texas, Magnolia, Texas, suggests the charge for teachers be limited to their share of food and facility costs and the reunion committee decides whether to pay or charge the teacher.
If you are going to invite any teachers, you must invite them all and be prepared to talk with them during the event, advise Debby Pattin and Carol Riley, Reunions Unlimited, Olympia, Washington. They feel it's important to send special, personal invitations to teachers - not just the reunion invitation that classmates receive.
   And, finally, from the editor of this magazine ... How much to charge must be decided by each class/committee. Some teachers may have extenuating circumstances, such as cost or being unable to get there. The first is one of many dilemmas, but if they pay or not, arrange transportation for teachers who would like to come but no longer drive or don't drive at night.

Deborah Swan, from Toukley, New South Wales, Australia, asked for entertainment ideas for her Gorokan High School Class of 1980 reunion.
   Denise Silva of Great Reunions, Garden Grove, California, cautioned that too much entertainment is just as bad, if not worse, than no entertainment. The majority of classmates want to spend their limited time reminiscing, not watching a show. She has been successful having the current school band and/or cheerleaders come for a brief alma mater and traditional cheer just before the awards. They do it for a small donation. Another suggestion is to have classmates send pictures before the reunion (with their name and address on the back) to be made into a video.
   Darla Methey at Reunions By Design in El Cajon, California, reports that they have a company come in with blackjack and crap tables. She says you can find companies in the yellow pages under “entertainment,” or contact the Convention and Visitors Bureau for referrals. The company they use costs about $100 an hour. Sometimes they offer raffle tickets at the end of the night for exchange of chips, with a prize of a 3-day/2-night stay in Las Vegas. These games are good for spouses and guests at reunions because they are happy and have something fun to do while the spouse enjoys talking to classmates. One of the DJs Methey hires devises contests. One requires a group of five to eight male classmates to strike poses or do a skit. Then the females do the same. Methey reports it’s great for laughs and a fun opener for the committee. They’ve also had comedians or a disk jockey who plays Name That Tune.
Nancy Shirey at A+ Reunion in Ellicott City, Maryland, adds a trivia game.
   Joseph W. Smith of Back to the Future Reunions in Pleasanton, California, says the three things to keep in mind for your reunion are: “Be creative and think outside the box. People are more interested in reminiscing than anything else, so any entertainment that you bring in should be unobtrusive. And keep it cheap!”
   Keeping that in mind, you are ready to start looking for entertainment. The first thing you should do is start talking to your classmates about who they work for and who they know. A lot of times we find that someone owns a company that has something we can use or knows someone that they can talk into donating a service or selling it to us at cost. Possibilities include Casino Nights, magicians that go table-to-table, a comedian during dinner, or just a fun icebreaker game. Local libraries offer books that describe hundreds of party games.

Q? Dee Shanholtz wrote, "I lost my high school Class of 1976 yearbook. Do you have any idea where I might find a replacement?"

A! Check your library, call the school. Find out who the publisher is and contact them directly.

Paula Sheagley found that photographers in her area purchase several copies of each yearbook. Her former reunion planning company once bought a huge selection of yearbooks from a photographer who was retiring. He told them he bought copies of the yearbook because he did so many of the Senior pictures. Many high schools have multiple "extra" copies of yearbooks in their yearbook departments and they often donated them to give away at reunions.

Q? Janice Clarkson, Midland, Texas, e-mailed, I want to put a small booklet together to distribute at our 1999 reunion. I need successful ideas or examples. I want to include graduation pictures along with recent photos from each classmate and their family. Help!

A! Paula Sheagley, reunion expert, responds.

A very easy and inexpensive idea is to send a printed questionnaire to classmates that has an area to neatly print or type their bio and "best memories" of school days. They attach a photo with or without family. Take the sheets to a printer and ask them to make "copies" for everyone.

Attach a cover and spiral binder. It's quick, easy and fun to see everyone's handwriting. Use a quick self-mailer (to save money on envelopes). Only expect about one-third to return their forms, so plan follow-up. Also, try this trick: tell classmates they can include their business cards (camera-ready advertising) on their personal page. Free advertising, everyone loves that these days!

Also consider these ideas. Ask other reunion planners what they've done. Check other kinds of organizations that do similar projects: family reunions, churches, organizations and associations. Ask your quick printer what jobs they've done and if they've done nothing similar: call around. Someone's already doing what you want to do and probably would love to tell you all about it! Good luck!

Q? "We are looking for an organization that takes on the task of finding classmates. We are in the process of putting together our 40th reunion for 2004 and need assistance. Can you recommend one?" e-mailed Juanita Hayes.

A! The professional management companies that organize reunions specialize in finding people ... it's part of their cost. Try www.reunions.com for something close to you. Tell them Reunions magazine sent you!

This might be the reunion where the solitary responsibility of your committee is to find a company or party planner to organize your reunion. Then, even committee members can be guests. Start by asking around for others who have hired services. It's in the best interest of the company to find as many classmates to come to your reunion as possible and their fees, usually all-inclusive, are not outrageous if you compare the cost to many other entertainment or leisure activities you attend.

Don't miss this opportunity to commit to a continuing search because some of your classmates are going to move a few more times by the time of your next reunion. Use your database and perhaps even recruit a searching fanatic in your class with the challenge to find everyone! Check an article by Bill Williams in Reunions magazine (Autumn 1997, Volume 8, Number 1).

Q? Kimberly Peterson wrote, "I am trying to set up my high school's ten-year reunion and I don't know where to start. I want to find the right company to do it but I am not sure I even know the right questions to ask. How can you tell good companies from bad? What can I expect a good company to do and for what price? Is there a good place look for this information?

A! Paula Sheagley* responds. Start with your local school district(s). Call a high school and ask them which company(ies) are reputable and stay in good communication. Professional reunion planning companies should register each reunion with schools and operate on good working terms with the local school offices/alumni associations.

Ask for references from the company. Then, call the references. Ask references to be candid about the good and the "bad" of working with that company.

Look for a fair price. Expect the fee to include all catering costs, rentals, entertainment, optional memory book. Then expect approximately $20 to be added as over-head charges; labor, research, printing, phones and postage plus a little profit.

*About the expert
Paula Sheagley wrote many class reunion articles for Reunions magazine several years ago so we turn to her expertise when faced with class reunion dilemmas. She is the former owner of a reunion planning business in southern Colorado and was a charter member and past president of the National Association of Reunion Managers. Paula is presently the event coordinator and marketing representative for Holy Cross Abbey, home of Benedictine Monks in Canon City, Colorado, which she describes as "beautiful grounds with wonderful reunion and retreat facilities built around a turn-of-the century."

Should you hire a professional?
We are often asked if it is better to organize a reunion with or without professional help. Our response suggests that the decision should be up to each reunion because it depends upon whether or not you have the time and energy to do a thorough job. There is much detail and many considerations over a long enough period of time so a serious commitment is called for.

We asked Debby Pattin, a partner in Reunions Unlimited, Olympia, Washington, and chair of the Ethics Committee for the National Association of Reunion Managers, to tell us why to use a professional reunion manager.

Professional reunion managers have the experience and offer a comprehensive set of services and expertise to make your class reunion a success. Just think about how much time it would take to locate alumni, organize events, prepare and mail announcements and registrations and coordinate registrations and confirmations. Professional managers know how to find classmates, the most difficult task of reunion planning and provide one place of contact for consistent and up-to-date information.

Professional mangers also pay up front costs, maintain web sites for secure on-line registration, provide toll-free phone numbers, e-mail and fax and credit card processing, deposit and bill paying. Then, consider music and photography, memory books, contacting local media, the school and alumni association, staffing events and paying for liability insurance. Professional managers take care of all those details and much more.

Here's the best part: there is no cost to the committee for using a reunion manager. Managers take the hassle out of planning a reunion and allow the committee to take the credit and have fun.

Members of the National Association of Reunion Managers follow strict industry standards and adhere to a code of ethics. They have strong working relationships with hotels, banquet facilities, caterers, DJs, vendors and suppliers. Best of all, your reunion committee always maintains decision-making power while working with a professional.

Like everything else, it is important to shop around and ask for and make reference checks for any potential manager. For information about a professional reunion manager in your area, visit the National Association of Reunion Managers web site www.reunions.com or call 800-654-2776.

How to reach the experts:
Debby Pattin and her partner, Carol Riley, own Reunions Unlimited, PO Box 11203, Olympia, Washington 98508; 360-866-8842 or e-mail reunions@reunionsunlimited.com.

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